It’s Personal, Or Is it?

Our natural tendency to take things personally can be a constant source of discomfort. Why do we feel like the actions of others are meant towards us? Chances are they have absolutely nothing to do with us.

Teenagers are plagued by this nonsense. They live by the follow, unfollow, like, left on read, unanswered snap chats, etc. We didn’t have social media or even phones while I was a teen but I was still self absorbed and sure that most things were about ME.

Around the age of 16, I was at the funeral for my grandmother in Ft. Worth. I remember being overly concerned with what I was wearing. During the service, I was sure that anyone who turned around and glanced my direction was looking at ME. I knew I looked fabulous when I overheard a woman say something about Madonna and assumed she was referring to ME. I quickly got the attention of my step sister and let her know that a woman did indeed think I looked just like Madonna! The lady was even telling her friends about ME. This was the 80’s and Madonna was a huge deal. Feeling cool, I decided to tell my Dad. He looked at me with an “are you kidding me?” look. He promptly explained to me that a Madonna in a church referred to a depiction of The Virgin Mary. And, indeed, there was a beautiful piece of art hanging behind me of The Virgin Mary and Baby Jesus. Oops, my bad.

When I am sure that I am being talked about in a room of people, I can laugh and remember that I’m not that big of a deal. Even if they are looking in my direction, it is unlikely that I am the topic of their conversation. Recalling and laughing about the Madonna experience helps me not to take things so personally.

Remember, how someone treats you has more to do with how they are doing personally than anything to do with you.

XX,

MG

Tea In The Neighborhood