Since February is officially the month of “love,” I’ve been thinking about all the people and things that I truly love — and how love can show up in so many different ways. I’m deeply grateful everyday that I feel loved by my family and dear friends.
But here’s where it gets interesting: what’s the real difference between liking someone or something and loving them (or it)? What makes us fall in love in the first place? And is love a feeling… or a verb?
Saying, “I love that restaurant,” rolls off the tongue way easier than saying, “I love that person.” The first is safe — low risk and highly delicious. The second one? That takes your heart, your vulnerability, and a little courage.
It’s funny how complicated love can be, but at the end of the day, everyone just wants to be loved. Whether it’s people or the work we create, we hope others see value in it — and maybe, love it too.
Most of the time, when I say I “love” something, I’m describing a feeling. But this year, I want to treat love like a verb. What would it look like if love wasn’t just how I felt, but something I did — something I actively practiced?
Because if love is only a feeling, it changes as quickly as my mood (and my mood, if you’ve met me when I am tired or hungry, is unpredictable).
When you love as a verb, it’s steady. It’s intentional. It’s something you choose.
Having kids is great practice at that. Parents care, support, and basically watch their hearts walk around in someone else’s body. You may not like them at certain moments (teenagers, anyone?), but that love? It’s unbreakable stuff.
So what does it look like to love your friends, your spouse, your siblings, your partner — not just in words, but through action? What would they recognize as love coming from you? I’m not sure we ask ourselves that often enough.
That brings me to the five love languages, a concept from Dr. Gary Chapman’s classic book. He describes five main ways people both express and receive love:
- Words of Affirmation – Saying “I love you,” offering encouragement, or expressing appreciation.
- Acts of Service – Doing thoughtful things that make someone’s life easier or brighter.
- Receiving Gifts – Not about the price tag, but the thought behind it.
- Quality Time – Undivided attention and presence (phones down, heart open).
- Physical Touch – A hug, a hand squeeze, or simple closeness that says, “I’m here.”
If you’re “speaking” love in your language, but it’s not their language, they might not feel what you mean to express. That doesn’t make your love less genuine — it just makes it a little lost in translation.
And if your family is anything like mine, sometimes our love language is… sarcasm with a side of mischief. We’re big on teasing each other and giving each other a hard time. You’ve got to have thick skin around here, because if we aren’t teasing you, we probably aren’t loving you. (It’s tough love, but it’s ours.)
So this February, I’m challenging myself (and maybe you, too) to love as a verb — to make love less about the butterflies and more about the practice.
Love as a decision. Love as an action. Love as something that doesn’t depend on how the day is going or what you get in return.
Because “I love you” is easy to say — but “I showed you love today” feels a lot more powerful.
Love ya!
XX,
MG